"O ko ni mo saare omo e!"
Friday, June 3, 2022, would've been our first born son Stephen's 28th birthday. "O ko ni mo saare omo e" is a prayer, word of blessing, and declaration in the Yoruba language. It means you will not know the grave or burial site of your child. It is sometimes declared in faith and in other times presumption and superstition. This declaration can also make it "taboo" for parents to publicly acknowledge the death of their child by attending wakes, funerals, burials, etc.
This declaration is spoken in superstition when one who lacks revelation or authority believes it to be so just because he/she said so. It is spoken in presumption (and sometimes spiritual/religious pride) when you believe bad things won't happen to you or your family just because of who you are in Christ and because God loves you.
O ko ni mo saare omo e is declared in faith when you have a revelation of God and spiritual principles. It is declared in faith when you've addressed cycles of negative patterns that would allow such a thing to occur. It is declared in faith when you humbly acknowledge that you do not understand ALL the ways of God so you cry out for the mercy of God. It is declared in faith when you realize you and your ancestors were born in sin and shaped in iniquity so you kneel before the mercy seat of God and ask to be wrapped in the protective wings of the cherubim. It is declared in faith when you know God is able and willing and like Meshach, Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego have decided to trust and obey God no matter what outcome God permits (Daniel 3:16-18).
My father is a Yoruba man by DNA and amazingly in some ways by tradition and culture. His great grandfather was stolen from Ogun State and taken to Jekyll Island on the Slave Ship the Wanderer in 1858. Daddy doesn't speak the language, doesn't eat the food, and has never visited Yorubaland. Yet, he did not attend Stephen's funeral and didn't "touch" the funeral arrangements. He doesn't know where the burial site is and rarely speaks of Stephen. This is what he has decided is needed for his healing process. We respect and honor that.
What is needed for my healing is different from what daddy needs. I was involved in planning. I saw the body. I attended the funeral. I talk, write, and journal about Stephen. And I talk about the loss because I understand that someone can be delivered from presumption and superstition through my transparently sharing my journey to healing. When EVIL men KILLED Emmitt Till and MUTILATED his body, his mom didn't allow the mortician to "touch up" his face. She insisted on an OPEN casket funeral so that others would SEE and KNOW the TRUTH. Beloved, KNOW the TRUTH. The TRUTH shall be your Shield and Buckler Who keeps you.
Why am I sharing? Don't religiously declare anything out of superstition. Ask God for REVELATION to TRULY live VICTORIOUSLY over sin, death and the grave. Know that NOTHING seperates you from God's love. God loves you even when God ALLOWS the unthinkable to happen. Bad things can and do happen to God's people (for example Job and the man born blind in John 9). When the unthinkable happens, don't let tradition dictate your response.
When the unthinkable happens, do as led by the Holy Spirit. Those who are led by God's Spirit (not traditional, cultural, religious norms) are God's sons/children. Do what is needed for your deliverance, healing, and restoration. Get a specialized/individualized prescription from the Lord. Follow God's plan for your life. Ask God to show you how to glorify Him even in the midst of the unthinkable.